SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

As of June 5, I am no longer married. The last weekend in June, I helped my XWW move out and into her new home. I then spent 6 days doing absolutely nothing, unless you count sitting by/in a pool and hot tub as actually doing something. This was a long awaited and desperately needed vacation.

I just wanted to update everyone here and thank you for the support I have received and continue to receive. My WW warned me about this site saying she read reviews which reported it was full of toxic people and bad advice. I have found the opposite to be true. Thank you all for your wisdom, your kindness, your patience, and your friendship.

Regarding looking forward, I have had some ladies already reach out and say they want to meet me. I know I'm not ready for another wedding, but I do intend to enjoy their friendship for a while and get to know them. I will not be secretive about me wanting to take time to adjust to my new life before getting serious with anyone, and I look at this as an opportunity to get to know some of them, and if things progress, we'll see where those paths lead.

Congratulations, with a side of bittersweetness. Good luck in your next endeavors and yes, be sure to heal before diving in the deep end of the dating pool. But have fun in the shallow end!

Thanks, BB!

Ditto what BB said. Enjoy but be sure to heal before getting serious.

Sorry this made me laugh out loud as I'm sure many WS's don't like the advice being given here:

My WW warned me about this site saying she read reviews which reported it was full of toxic people and bad advice.

Good to hear you are moving on - I too enjoy pool/hot tub time to wind down and I find it immensely relaxing now that I am infidelity-free. Enjoy - you deserve it!

Thanks, ThisIsSoLonely! The change in lifestyle without the WW has led to less stress, and I can feel that in my home. Yes, there is an amount of depression, but it's just something I have to work through. Someone told me I would mourn the death of my marriage, and that may be true.

However, I'm getting better as time elapses, and I know that's what it will take. Overall, I'm doing ok! Thanks for the encouragement!

Someone told me I would mourn the death of my marriage, and that may be true.

It is so true and important to do. Let yourself go through the steps of grieving so you do not get stuck on your road to healing/recovery.

I mourned the death of the M but also the death of the future I thought we had. I would be driving along and BAM, tears out of no where, etc.

But it is important to take the time to do this. You want to be totally healed so you can walk into your NB healthy.

It is an emotional rollercoaster but the peace that comes with this stage is just priceless.

Good luck on your NB!

Thanks, EvenKeel.

I mourned the death of the M but also the death of the future I thought we had.

Yes, you hit the head of the nail. I went through that process, as well. We had things planned out to do with our grandchildren and now that's all gone. Some much destruction because of a short-sighted, selfish series of choices.

Thanks for the advice about moving on. Some days I feel 100% ready, and others, not-so-sure. Kinda' like driving down the road and hitting patches of mud. The patches are getting further apart and less dense. I know eventually I won't have to go through any more at all, or if I do, they will just be puddles - hardly noticeable. I think it's a time thing.

To help out, I am joining a bowling league in a few weeks. I spoiled myself by ordering a new ball, bag, shoes, and etc. I think it will be healthy to socialize more, and I might make a few friends along the way!

Thanks to everyone for your support!

Since my D, I have made so many new friends and have had so many fun adventures.

Enjoy your freedom!

Good for you, BeachWalker! I am happy that you are moving on and going for the life you deserve...

Great update! Life on the other side after you escape infidelity can be wonderful. Keep going!!

countrydirt and WontBeFooledAgain and leafields:

Thank you all for the encouragement. To my very big surprise, I have had a few women express interest in me, and I find that very flattering. It is very nice to once again be desired.

It's really interesting: While married, when women would flirt with me, I had no desire to flirt back. I was flattered, yes, that they were interested in me, but the feeling wasn't mutual. I had a woman I was in love with and there was absolutely no want or need for that kind of attention from anyone else. Even when my WW cut me off, I still did not seek that kind of attention from other women.

Now that I am single and it's perfectly proper to talk with and date with other women, it seems so odd. I just hope that doesn't become apparent on my dates!!

I had my first date this past weekend and the lady was very sweet. When we met, she gave me an "A-frame" hug. But at the end of the date, she gave me a big hug. I took that as positive. Maybe some of you ladies can chime in on that.

I have another date with a different lady this coming weekend. We have spoken on the phone several times and I look forward to meeting her in person.

And, you all are right -- This is fun!

Glad you're having fun. I don't know what to tell you about the hug because I'm not a hugger unless you're in my bubble.