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General :
Technical Question

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 Fracturedfool (original poster new member #84734) posted at 9:05 PM on Saturday, August 3rd, 2024

Anyone know about data usage on older Samsung J10 cell phone. My senses are telling me something is not right with WH usage. I don’t know enough about it but don’t trust him one bit when he says he has no contact with AP. There are no texts since March of last year but I have noticed an increase in number of mb used per month. I think this indicates they may be messaging or emailing. He tried to tell me because he has a lot of pictures this may be from the backup on his phone. I have newer model of same phone and may have 0.50 mb per month where he uses 150 - 250 per month. Today I saw usage of 4.78 mb at 6:45 am and another 10.75 mb at 8:30 am when he got up. This is very suspicious to me. Anyone have any insight? I don’t think it’s normal and he is continuing to lie to me, no surprise.

Me BS 70 WH 72 M 42 yrs Together 52 yrs D days 1976-1979 New D day Jan 1 2023

Should have believed what he was the first time

posts: 13   ·   registered: Apr. 14th, 2024   ·   location: Canadian Prairies
id 8844107
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Heartbrokenwife23 ( member #84019) posted at 2:05 AM on Sunday, August 4th, 2024

I’m not super technical … maybe he’s not connected to WIFI (if he’s not connected then it uses a lot more data). Also, watching videos on the net will also eat up data.

At the time of the A:
Me: BW (34 turned 35) Him: WH (37)
Together 13 years; M for 7 ("celebrated" our 8th) DDay: Oct. 12, 2023
3 Month PA with Married COW

posts: 113   ·   registered: Oct. 19th, 2023   ·   location: Canada
id 8844115
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 Fracturedfool (original poster new member #84734) posted at 5:21 AM on Sunday, August 4th, 2024

Heartbroken. He turned off wi-fi as he is super paranoid about somebody stealing his info. You may be correct in that it does more data for updates and backups. Highly suspicious, though, that it jumps considerably when he goes to the garage where he keeps the phone. Strange that he never let the damn thing out of his sight last year and now he never keeps it on him. He is very nontechnical and wouldn’t know how to download an app if his life depended on it but if someone like his two faced sister walked him through it he may have set up a secret email account. I’m just throwing things out there because I am suspicious.

Me BS 70 WH 72 M 42 yrs Together 52 yrs D days 1976-1979 New D day Jan 1 2023

Should have believed what he was the first time

posts: 13   ·   registered: Apr. 14th, 2024   ·   location: Canadian Prairies
id 8844121
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Fantastic ( member #84663) posted at 12:57 PM on Sunday, August 4th, 2024

I am sorry there is still a trust issue between you and your spouse after a year.

He may not be tech savvy but they become! As you can see it is possible to message someone just by being part of a website like SI that allows messaging between users, so if data have increased, he is using the internet more. WHAT IS HE USING IT FOR? You said he keeps the phone in the garage. Is it your home garage or a garage as a place of work? Could you access the phone and see if there is a browsing history?

posts: 169   ·   registered: Mar. 28th, 2024
id 8844131
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Heartbrokenwife23 ( member #84019) posted at 3:41 PM on Sunday, August 4th, 2024

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I completely understand why you would be suspicious. I know for me personally my own data use will "skyrocket" if I’m not connected to wifi and it’s generally only noticeable if I’m watching say YouTube/Netflix etc. Sending a message or looking at pictures when you’re not connected to wifi doesn’t really fluctuate usage as much. Your concerns are valid nonetheless and I would still personally investigate for some clarification if you feel it’s warranted.

At the time of the A:
Me: BW (34 turned 35) Him: WH (37)
Together 13 years; M for 7 ("celebrated" our 8th) DDay: Oct. 12, 2023
3 Month PA with Married COW

posts: 113   ·   registered: Oct. 19th, 2023   ·   location: Canada
id 8844134
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sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 4:43 PM on Sunday, August 4th, 2024

A year is too little time to rebuild trust, especially because only using the phone in the garage seems like at least a yell ow flag. There's a way to display data usage by app, but 1) I've forgotten how to do it on Android, and 2), you need to have the phone in your hands. If, you've got a red flag. your HWS is reluctant to give it to you.

150-250 MB could be the apps' self maintenance, though. If he gives you his phone, the yellow flag may be no problem at all.

fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.

posts: 30206   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011   ·   location: Illinois
id 8844138
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