Now that I am ( anxiously) awaiting separation I’m trying to see what costs I can cut. I realize that I have some recurring monthly expenses from trying to stay married.
He never helped with housework, when I was working p/t and the kids were little or when I was working f/t. I used to get soooo frustrated but I listened to Dr. Laura say, "don’t divorce your husband over housework" and others telling me to " let it go" I’d try that but couldn’t, we’d get into fights. His solution? Hire a housekeeper. Expense #1
Ditto yard work. I recall being eight months pregnant and mowing the lawn, ignore, fight then gardener. #2
Anything that needs to be fixed around the house. Am I going to go on You Tube and figure it out while he watches tv? Handyman #3
Painting. I painted the house while he watched, painted the huge deck every year. His solution to the deck was actually a great one, Trex. But in anticipation of selling the house I’ll pick up a brush again instead of him calling Painter #4.
Here’s an expense that is the first and hardest to cut; WH’s best friend’s wife started working at a car dealership and needed to do a lease deal. I fell on the sword: BMW #5
I’ve been gaining weight and need to lose for my own sake ( come on divorce stress!) as well as having that "he’ll cheat on me" thought in my head. We couldn’t agree on putting a lap pool/ endless pool in so, Club membership #6.
WH doesn’t cook, he can but doesn’t. After he retired I’d be driving home from work at 5:30 and he’d call to ask me what’s for dinner? We have kids, they gotta eat. I love to cook, I just start to resent it so Dinners out all the time #7.
We used to go camping. Kids and dogs love camping ( my son is camping now). But WH gained weight and snores too loudly, none of us can sleep. It takes a lot of prep and he doesn’t want to do it so Hotel vacations with Dogsitters #8.
Look at what I’ve spent to keep my sanity with him. I worry about affording my own place but going through this I see I can cut about $2500 a month and that’s not including cutting the tv cable bill.