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Newest Member: Brokenhearted3663

Off Topic :
Best wishes for a safe and happy Independence Day!

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 sisoon (original poster moderator #31240) posted at 10:33 PM on Monday, July 3rd, 2023

** Not Posting as Staff **

I'm a Rhode Islander. We declared independence on May 4, 1776, but even so, I hope to enjoy fireworks tonight and a parade tomorrow. After all, Rhode Islanders made significant contributions to the Revolution, even though our history is not as clean as I would wish.

A year ago July 4, I was heading to Highland Park, IL on my bike when some so-and-so rode in front of me, cut me off, and then hung a U-turn despite my 'ON YOUR LEFT!'. He ran his bike into mine. We both went down. I was bloody but not badly injured. I thought about killing the other rider.

A few people saw the 'accident' and offered help. One asked where I was headed, and he told me about the killings at the HP parade. He offered to drive me and my bike home. I rode home, though.I contrasted my accident with the trauma experienced by the attendees at the HP parade, and I didn't come out of the comparison feeling very good. I felt compassion for the parade attendees and the dead an wounded and even for the shooter. Compassion seemed so much more appropriate than anger.

I hope we all have a wonderful 4th of July, enjoying each other and celebrating the Declaration of Independence.

* My shame at wanting to kill the guy is minimal; it has made me more tolerant of other riders. And I now have it engraved inside my skull that a rider who does one unsafe thing is likely to keep doing unsafe things, so I get away from them very carefully.

[This message edited by SI Staff at 10:38 PM, Monday, July 3rd]

fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.

posts: 30214   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011   ·   location: Illinois
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number4 ( member #62204) posted at 11:55 PM on Monday, July 3rd, 2023

I had way too many connections to the HP parade that day. People I know who should have been there, but weren't for different reasons, and people I know who knew people who were killed. I hope HP can continue to heal this weekend. FWIW... in lieu of fireworks, they're putting on a drone show. If the drone show is anything like their fireworks, it will be spectacular. Of course, there are silent fireworks, but someone has decided fireworks are not fireworks unless the explosion rattles your windows. So the silent ones struggle to be mainstream.

I hope other municipalities will buy into the drone option. I'm so tired of amateurs shooting off their own fireworks, and I would imagine if I lived in HP after last year, I would not appreciate the sound or light flashing of fireworks as a trigger. Too many pets are completely traumatized by fireworks, and July 4th ranks as the top day of every year for lost pets. I sometimes have sympathy for municipalities that produce their own shows, if it's only for one day a year for half an hour. But around here (as it was back in the Chicago area), they started almost a week ago, and go on from twilight to midnight at least, and will be like this through next weekend. Luckily our pooch has long floppy ears, so his hearing isn't as acute as most dogs. Our previous dog was traumatized every year, no matter how loud we turned up the music or TV and closed all window treatments.

@sisoon - I'll bet I know exactly what bike trail you were on when that happened. I've been on it myself.

Me: BWHim: WHMarried - 30+ yearsTwo adult daughters1st affair: 2005-20072nd-4th affairs: 2016-2017Many assessments/polygraph: no sex addictionStatus: R

posts: 1358   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2018   ·   location: New England
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