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Newest Member: T00much

New Beginnings :
Hey fam - checking in

Topic is Sleeping.
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 Tripletrouble (original poster member #39169) posted at 1:02 AM on Monday, January 4th, 2021

It has been awhile. One of the things that is interesting about SI is that the wisdom one gains here applies to many areas of life and continues to benefit me long after I've survived infidelity and divorce.

It has been over seven years since my divorce. It has been over a year since my son died. In the time since then I have had other losses, including other lost loved ones and COVID related financial devastation.

I'm still here. I'm still fighting. I'm trying so hard to make sense of all the loss and chaos of the last seven - going on eight - years. If you still have everyone you love - give thanks and let the rest go.

My ex is still a monster. If you are wondering if you made or are making the right decision by leaving an NPD, you are. I have gone completely NO CONTACT with my ex because of the way he continues to devastate the people he loves, including his surviving child and new wife. It's sickening to me to think of the years and tears I threw away on this terrible person. He is still cheating and will never have a fraction of the character I have. I am profoundly relieved to be rid of him. Thank you again SI for being a lantern in the dark.

I wish you all a kinder and gentler 2021.

40 somethings - me BW after 20 years
D Day April 2013
Divorced November 2013
Happily remarried 2018
Time is a great healer but a terrible beautician.

posts: 1175   ·   registered: May. 3rd, 2013
id 8621805
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Phoenix1 ( member #38928) posted at 4:51 AM on Monday, January 4th, 2021

Glad you checked in TT! Seems like you are weathering the storm, which is great news.

Ya know, I stopped trying to make sense of all my losses and just accepted that it just is the way it is no matter how much it hurts and sucks.

Keep being your strong self and keep up the NC with your asshole ex. You're doing great!

Hope your new year is a great one.

fBS - Me
Xhole - Multiple LTAs/2 OCs over 20+yrs
Adult Kids
Happily divorced!

You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending. ~C.S. Lewis~

posts: 9059   ·   registered: Apr. 9th, 2013   ·   location: Land of Indifference
id 8621840
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BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 5:39 AM on Monday, January 4th, 2021

Hi TT

Glad you have developed such a useful perspective and are weathering the ups and downs of life. Keep on keeping on- and thanks for checking in.

Me: BS 57 (49 on d-day)Him: *who cares ;-) *. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)

**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **

posts: 6209   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2016   ·   location: Northern CA
id 8621843
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BrokenheartedUK ( member #43520) posted at 8:34 PM on Monday, January 4th, 2021

Hi TT!! Thanks for the update. You’re doing amazing. I was thinking about you getting through the holidays. Big hug!

Me: BS
He cheated and then lied. Apparently cheaters lie. Huh. 13 months of false R. Divorced! 8/16 3 teenage kids
"The barn's burnt down
Now
I can see the moon"
-Mizuta Masahide

posts: 3426   ·   registered: May. 24th, 2014
id 8622000
Topic is Sleeping.
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