mchercheur ( member #37735) posted at 3:38 PM on Monday, May 26th, 2014
Me: BW; Him: WH --Had 10 mo. EA/ PA with COW; Dday 5/2011 Married 34 years/Together 35 years/4 kids together, and 1 grandbaby; OW 20 years younger than us/divorced no kids Trying to R; don't know what the final outcome will be
needfriendshere ( member #43350) posted at 7:25 PM on Monday, May 26th, 2014
This is wonderful. It's like you have taken the best out of every book on the subject and summarized it for us all. Had I read this before going shopping, I could have saved a lot of money. You hit every main point right on the head. Thank you so much! For anyone who is just tuning in to this site, what Tactical Primer has provided here is priceless!
Me: early 50's
WH: early 50's
Married: 23 years
DS: 21 years old
Other DS: 18 years old
D-day: 2/14/2014
H's LTA lasted 6 years, his EA's lasted during most of our M, but we are both trying hard to R.
lordhasaplan? ( member #30079) posted at 4:44 PM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
BS- Me (45)
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Currently in R.
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.
Lyonesse ( member #32943) posted at 7:51 AM on Monday, June 2nd, 2014
annb ( member #22386) posted at 10:33 PM on Sunday, June 8th, 2014
norabird ( member #42092) posted at 4:09 PM on Tuesday, June 17th, 2014
yearsofpain25 ( member #42012) posted at 8:33 PM on Thursday, June 19th, 2014
"I remind myself of this. I am a survivor. I have taken all this world has dished out and am still here. So there is no reason to be afraid. Whatever happens, I will survive. So now onto living. It is time for me to thrive." - DrJekyll
brkn_heartd ( member #30396) posted at 2:51 AM on Monday, July 14th, 2014
Me-57 BS
Him 65-WS
Married 38 yrs, together 40
Affair Aug-Dec 09
official D-12/14/09
broke NC 1/31/10
second D 3/19/10
mamajen00 ( member #43810) posted at 5:20 AM on Tuesday, July 15th, 2014
I wish I had seen this post three months ago when I first showed up here. Such good information!
BS- me 37
WH- him 38
1 son - almost 5
Married 8 years
Together 13 years
DDay 4/19/14
9 months of intense EA
2 days of PA
littleflower ( member #42673) posted at 8:16 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
DD 13/1/14
Him WH
OW - what a cow
3 kids under 4
Jpapageorge ( member #31800) posted at 4:06 AM on Sunday, August 3rd, 2014
"Either get busy livin' or get busy dyin'." (and I prefer to live)
"Shame on me for kissing you with my eyes closed."
Spectemur agendo.
Me: FBBF
jjct ( member #17484) posted at 1:57 PM on Saturday, August 9th, 2014
steadychevy ( member #42608) posted at 11:03 PM on Saturday, August 9th, 2014
I so wish I had found this back just after Christmas, 2002. Of course it wasn't written then. I wish I had found SI back then. Instead I found some sites that did me more harm than good.
I wonder, painfully, what my life would have been like if I hadn't done everything wrong. Now, instead of trying to heal after stopping my WW short - shock and awe, I am trying to heal after a DDay 1 on September 1, 2013 almost 11 after I became convinced (almost) my WW was committing adultery. I never caught them (almost did a few times) and I could never prove it and WW lied vigorously, continuously, frequently and effectively for all those years.
How different my life might be if I would have had the advice beginning this thread instead of the advice I got and if I would have hired a PI. If I was doing this at 51 instead of at 63.
I have been on SI lurking before registering at the end of February. I just read this primer this morning. It is so valuable but just too late for me.
BH(me)72(now); XWW 64; M 42 yrsDDay1-01/09/13;DDay2-26/10/13;DDay3-19/12/13;DDay4-21/01/14LTA-09/02-06/06? OM - COW 4 years; "dates" w/3 lovers post engagement;ONS w/stranger post commitment, lies, lies, liesSeparated 23/09/2017; D 16/03/2020
shiftingsand ( member #43656) posted at 1:18 PM on Monday, August 18th, 2014
"This wasn't about you. Or your looks. Or hers. There was no contest and she did not "win." He's just insecure or an asshole or an insecure asshole." Plan C.
Edie ( member #26133) posted at 8:22 AM on Friday, August 22nd, 2014
trying22 ( member #44592) posted at 8:21 PM on Friday, August 22nd, 2014
jjct ( member #17484) posted at 5:00 PM on Wednesday, August 27th, 2014
UpInTheAirNow ( member #37777) posted at 4:42 PM on Wednesday, September 3rd, 2014
ME 47
WW 52
DDay 6/13/12
Separated 3/13 and NC for my own sanity.
Married 17 years, together 27 yrs.
Jpapageorge ( member #31800) posted at 11:35 PM on Friday, September 5th, 2014
"Either get busy livin' or get busy dyin'." (and I prefer to live)
"Shame on me for kissing you with my eyes closed."
Spectemur agendo.
Me: FBBF
yearsofpain25 ( member #42012) posted at 9:30 PM on Monday, September 8th, 2014
"I remind myself of this. I am a survivor. I have taken all this world has dished out and am still here. So there is no reason to be afraid. Whatever happens, I will survive. So now onto living. It is time for me to thrive." - DrJekyll
