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Newest Member: Plantlady

Just Found Out :
Tactical Primer

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annb ( member #22386) posted at 1:57 AM on Saturday, March 12th, 2011

bump

posts: 12201   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2009   ·   location: Northeast
id 5127420
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lordhasaplan? ( member #30079) posted at 8:15 PM on Tuesday, March 15th, 2011

Bump for SadCat22

BS- Me (45)
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Currently in R.
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.

posts: 2106   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2010
id 5133048
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Rise_Above ( member #23674) posted at 4:21 PM on Saturday, March 19th, 2011

volley

You can live the way you believe this is your opportunity to let your life be one that lights the way~F.Battistelli

*****
God's hand was an avocado branch

posts: 14226   ·   registered: Apr. 18th, 2009   ·   location: Chrys a lis
id 5139378
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m334455 ( member #26893) posted at 7:37 PM on Wednesday, March 23rd, 2011

Bumping for our newer members.

BW 38, 5 kids
Dday Dec. 2009

posts: 4034   ·   registered: Dec. 22nd, 2009
id 5146040
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annb ( member #22386) posted at 1:07 AM on Saturday, March 26th, 2011

bump

posts: 12201   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2009   ·   location: Northeast
id 5149105
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annb ( member #22386) posted at 12:38 PM on Tuesday, March 29th, 2011

bump

posts: 12201   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2009   ·   location: Northeast
id 5154523
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annb ( member #22386) posted at 11:51 PM on Tuesday, March 29th, 2011

bump

posts: 12201   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2009   ·   location: Northeast
id 5155853
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HigherGround ( member #31644) posted at 12:39 AM on Wednesday, March 30th, 2011

A good read, it sounds like i fall into the No Contact category which is pretty much what I'm doing and only a month from DDay. I wish i had seen this sooner, my first reaction to the affair was to kick him out but I gave him too much power back after we'd had our first discussion and I'd told him he had a choice to make. I should have stayed more in control and used some of the Tactics discussed here, however I'm really not sure it would have made any difference to where i am now, with the exception that I'd have kept my power from the start instead of reclaiming it 3 weeks in.

Me: BW
Him: WH
2nd Marriage 6 years together for 7. D-Day in Feb 2011.
*DD1 almost 3 yr old, Quad Spastic CP, Complex Seizure Disorder.
*DD2 6 month old bundle of wonder.
*seperated - some good days; some not so good days.

posts: 610   ·   registered: Mar. 28th, 2011   ·   location: Canada
id 5155932
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bufffalo ( member #21854) posted at 6:29 AM on Saturday, April 2nd, 2011

DDay 9/25/2008

BH-me

posts: 6172   ·   registered: Dec. 1st, 2008   ·   location: Texas
id 5163103
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BetrayedWife7 ( member #31728) posted at 11:54 AM on Sunday, April 3rd, 2011

This Tactical Primer is just amazing and should be required reading of anyone just entering the world of Surviving Infidelity. Great job!

Me - B/W 52
Him - W/S 53
Married - 30 years
5 Children
D-Day - August 5 & 26, 2010; April 27, 2021

posts: 67   ·   registered: Apr. 2nd, 2011
id 5164780
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annb ( member #22386) posted at 12:50 PM on Sunday, April 10th, 2011

bump

posts: 12201   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2009   ·   location: Northeast
id 5177995
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Pocketdialed ( member #31687) posted at 1:12 AM on Monday, April 11th, 2011

I'm glad this finally got bumped up so I caught it. Better late than never. Thanks!

posts: 71   ·   registered: Mar. 30th, 2011
id 5178917
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Rowdy12 ( new member #31822) posted at 1:46 PM on Monday, April 11th, 2011

Dear SerJR, Thank you for the Tactical Primer. I do have a question though. What if I think we're past this point, he's given up the OW and has given me access to ALL e-mail and phone accounts? Should I still be doing the 180 (so difficult)? When can I go back to being my loving and caring self? I know it's still early (DD#1 2-23-11 DD#2FD 3-15-11) but I think we're in the reconcilliation (RD 3-20-11) stage?

Rowdy12
DD#1 2-23-11 DD#2FD 3-15-11 R-Date 3-20-11

posts: 45   ·   registered: Apr. 10th, 2011   ·   location: California
id 5179409
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annb ( member #22386) posted at 3:53 PM on Wednesday, April 13th, 2011

bump

posts: 12201   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2009   ·   location: Northeast
id 5183967
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annb ( member #22386) posted at 12:25 AM on Saturday, April 16th, 2011

bump

posts: 12201   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2009   ·   location: Northeast
id 5189277
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bufffalo ( member #21854) posted at 4:10 PM on Saturday, April 16th, 2011

bump

DDay 9/25/2008

BH-me

posts: 6172   ·   registered: Dec. 1st, 2008   ·   location: Texas
id 5190095
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lordhasaplan? ( member #30079) posted at 2:12 AM on Tuesday, April 19th, 2011

BS- Me (45)
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Currently in R.
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.

posts: 2106   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2010
id 5194120
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jpm0rgan ( member #31287) posted at 3:40 PM on Tuesday, April 19th, 2011

Bump. Looks as though theres a few WTF just happend? folks just joining that need to read this.

JP
D-Day- 2/18/11
Me BS 40
Her WS 38
Married 5 years
2 Wonderful Girls

posts: 137   ·   registered: Feb. 22nd, 2011
id 5194945
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annb ( member #22386) posted at 11:34 PM on Thursday, April 21st, 2011

bump

posts: 12201   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2009   ·   location: Northeast
id 5200309
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kernel ( member #27035) posted at 1:47 AM on Sunday, April 24th, 2011

bump

"On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that's pretty good."

posts: 5379   ·   registered: Jan. 3rd, 2010   ·   location: Midwest
id 5203947
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