Topic is Sleeping.
HouseOfPlane (original poster member #45739) posted at 8:02 PM on Saturday, May 25th, 2024
Lots of reasons to ask. Short list for why to ask a question:
- you want to know the answer
- you want to know if they know the answer
- you want to know if they will honestly answer
- you want to know if they will willingly answer
- you want them to know you are thinking of the question
- you want to watch their reaction when they hear the question
Others?
[This message edited by HouseOfPlane at 9:57 PM, Saturday, May 25th]
DDay 1986: R'd, it was hard, hard work.
“Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?”
― Mary Oliver
Groot1988 ( member #84337) posted at 4:12 AM on Sunday, May 26th, 2024
- I want to know he will throw her under the bus and run her over
- I want to know my pain is more important than his pain
- I want to see him cry as he has to relive what he thought was so great but destroyed his children
- I want to know what I’m trying to forgive
- I want to know what he was capable of
- I want to see him hurt
Married 5 years (together 11) Four children Me Bs 36Him WH 35- 4 month PA Dday Oct 6- lots of TT final disclosure Jan 16.
"If we walk through hell we might as well hold hands, we should make this a home"- citizen soldier
InkHulk ( member #80400) posted at 4:39 AM on Sunday, May 26th, 2024
- I want enough credible information to stop my brain from spinning
- I fucking deserve to know the truth about my life.
- I want ammunition against AP in case I need it later in life
People are more important than the relationships they are in.
Webbit ( member #84517) posted at 7:01 AM on Sunday, May 26th, 2024
- I want him to remember what he did so he knows how fucking stupid and pathetic he was.
- I want him to know that if he does anything like this again he is out on his arse.
Notaboringwife ( member #74302) posted at 1:56 PM on Sunday, May 26th, 2024
-you want to understand
-you need to hear the answer one more time
-you want emotional support
-you want reassurance
fBW. My scarred heart has an old soul.
SacredSoul33 ( member #83038) posted at 2:01 PM on Sunday, May 26th, 2024
I didn’t want AP to know more than I did. I couldn’t stand that she knew more about the reality of my H at the time, and knew about his previous affairs before I did.
I didn’t want him to have ANY untainted memories of her. I was going to taint every last little thing by asking about it.
Gasping for air while volunteering to give others CPR is not heroic.
Your nervous system will always choose a familiar hell over an unfamiliar heaven.
HouseOfPlane (original poster member #45739) posted at 11:43 PM on Tuesday, May 28th, 2024
I didn’t want AP to know more than I did. I couldn’t stand that she knew more about the reality of my H at the time, and knew about his previous affairs before I did.
I didn’t want him to have ANY untainted memories of her. I was going to taint every last little thing by asking about it.
I could have written this too.
DDay 1986: R'd, it was hard, hard work.
“Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?”
― Mary Oliver
HellIsNotHalfFull ( member #83534) posted at 2:10 AM on Wednesday, May 29th, 2024
Marriage is a bond, it’s two people who are supposed to say FTW and that no matter what happens outside of the marriage, we are supposed to always have each other, and no one else.
Ask questions to see if they have any potential of actually remembering what it means to be married. Affairs prove they at the least lost it and don’t deserve it. Answers at least give some chance of rebuilding
Me mid 40s BH
Her 40s STBX WW
3 year EA 1 year PA.
DDAY 1 Feb 2022. DDAY 2 Jun 2022. DDAY 3/4/5/6/7 July 2024
Nothing but abuse and lies and abuse false R for three years. Divorcing and never looking back.
Topic is Sleeping.
