Topic is Sleeping.
MySolstice (original poster new member #84273) posted at 9:00 AM on Wednesday, May 22nd, 2024
"I deserved better!" " I deserve better!" Do this, believe this, and make your decisions from this point. You deserved better. You deserve better. Deep breath, let it out, believe it. As for nthe other half of the relationship, you already decided you deserved better. That鈥檚 how you justified everything, so I鈥檓 not talking to you. I鈥檓 not too awfully worried about your sense of self. But betrayed spouses, whether you stay, you go, you build a new life, you need to really get that in your heart. You deserved better. You deserve better. Stop coming from a place a supplicance, weakness, terror, loss, heartbreak. Come from strength. You deserve love too, you deserve excitement too, you deserve acceptance too. You matter, you always have.
Him cheater, me imperfect human and wife/exwife. Four kids together, married 22 years, affair at 16 years, 6 years of struggling to put it back together, divorced 11 years now.
The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 11:58 AM on Wednesday, May 22nd, 2024
Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 11 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.
Tanner ( Guide #72235) posted at 4:28 PM on Wednesday, May 22nd, 2024
And pursuing better is not selfish. So many BS鈥檚 are afraid to demand better because of the fall out. All of the fallout, consequences, and collateral damage is 100% on the WS.
I am referring to the 180, it saved me, my sanity, my health and my W. She burned it down, I bulldozed it.
Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R BH M 32 years
SadieMae ( member #42986) posted at 4:53 PM on Wednesday, May 22nd, 2024
Yes! We do deserve better!
I want to share something I wrote the day after D-Day. I wrote this out and put it on the mirror to reaffirm myself.
I am (Sadie).
I am (Sadie).
I am a Goddess.
I am (Sadie), Queen of the Fae.
I am (Sadie), Queen of Hearts.
I deserve to be treated like a queen. The return on that investment would be amazing for the man willing to make it.
I want attention.
I want thoughtfulness.
I want romance.
I want to feel cherished and adored.
I want to feel like the most beautiful woman ever.
I want to feel like he knows he鈥檚 lucky to have me.
I want you to never forget what you lost and to be thankful for every moment that you are able to be with me. If I am the best thing that has ever happened to you, you should make sure that I know that every hour of every day.
If you do not tend a garden, the flowers will never bloom.
My biggest struggle (is) was not failing to see my own worth, but knowing that he failed to see my worth.
Me: BW D-day 3/9/2014
TT until 6/2016
TT again Fall 2020
Yay! A new D-Day on 11/8/2023 WTAF
emergent8 ( member #58189) posted at 6:19 PM on Wednesday, May 22nd, 2024
Love this SadieMae.
My biggest struggle (is) was not failing to see my own worth, but knowing that he failed to see my worth.
But... and I know you know this... that's a HIM problem, not a YOU problem.
Me: BS. Him: WS.
D-Day: Feb 2017 (8 m PA with married COW).
Happily reconciled.
crazyblindsided ( member #35215) posted at 6:38 PM on Wednesday, May 22nd, 2024
Definitely we deserve better. In my case I left because I knew I deserved better than how I was being treated. Life has been amazing since then and I will always honor myself.
fBS/fWS(me):51 Mad-hattered after DD (2008)
XWS:53 Serial Cheater, Diagnosed NPD
DD(21) DS(18)
XWS cheated the entire M spanning 19 years
Discovered D-Days 2006,2008,2012, False R 2014
Divorced 8/8/24
SadieMae ( member #42986) posted at 1:54 AM on Thursday, May 23rd, 2024
Removing this because it's off topic.
This is a power post, rock on!
[This message edited by SadieMae at 2:01 AM, Thursday, May 23rd]
Me: BW D-day 3/9/2014
TT until 6/2016
TT again Fall 2020
Yay! A new D-Day on 11/8/2023 WTAF
Topic is Sleeping.
