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General :
Message from the OW

Topic is Sleeping.
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 KiboGaAru (original poster member #83847) posted at 2:10 AM on Monday, May 20th, 2024

OW sent me a very long message.
Trying to explain why she bought a gift for my WH.

She said she got to do what she needs to do eventhough she knows it was a selfish act. 馃檮

She said "dont worry about my husband" (I informed her H about her buying my H the gift) and she continued you should worry about yourself and have pity on yourself because everyone is moving on now except you.

She also said that she is sorry if I have the impression that they are still talking to each other and she doesn't have any plan. She said that she just need to do something for my H so she can move forward and let go of him?!
And it is up to my H whether he'll take it or not.

And at the end of the message and after all some of sarcasm in the message, she said she is sorry for the pain she had cause for me and my children.

TBH, I dont feel that she was really sorry. I mean, Im sorry but she knew from the start that my WH is married and have kids.
She even continued their A right after she got married thinking that my WH will stop the wedding for her! Sick!馃あ

This gives me trigger again.
I really dont know if I should call her or even respond to her. But thinking about it, Id rather not to. I dont want to waste anymore of my time to this bitch!
The audacity! How does OW have the nerve to even play the victim of what happened?!

Anyway, really dont know what I am asking here. I just want to really let this out rather than breaking down again.

posts: 106   路   registered: Sep. 8th, 2023
id 8837081
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HellFire ( member #59305) posted at 2:43 AM on Monday, May 20th, 2024

Well, fuck her very much. mad

Don't respond. She is baiting you. That wasn't an apology, at all.

it is up to my H whether he'll take it or not.

The audacity!

But you are what you did
And I'll forget you, but I'll never forgive
The smallest man who ever lived..

posts: 6819   路   registered: Jun. 20th, 2017   路   location: The Midwest
id 8837082
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InkHulk ( member #80400) posted at 2:55 AM on Monday, May 20th, 2024

Feel your rage. Maybe find a way to return that gift to her husband in as hurtful as possible manner to her. And then get the ultimate revenge and forget her.

People are more important than the relationships they are in.

posts: 2449   路   registered: Jun. 28th, 2022
id 8837083
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Groot1988 ( member #84337) posted at 3:06 AM on Monday, May 20th, 2024

I second ink since murder isn鈥檛 an option. smile

[This message edited by Groot1988 at 3:06 AM, Monday, May 20th]

Married 5 years (together 11) Four children Me Bs 36Him WH 35- 4 month PA Dday Oct 6- lots of TT final disclosure Jan 16.

"If we walk through hell we might as well hold hands, we should make this a home"- citizen soldier

posts: 465   路   registered: Jan. 6th, 2024   路   location: Darker side of gray
id 8837084
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fournlau ( member #71803) posted at 3:10 AM on Monday, May 20th, 2024

I also received a message from OW once. Telling me about OC and how much they are looking like WH every day rolleyes And "wondered" if my children knew about OC and how maybe she should "tell" them. Honestly, didn't matter cause they all already knew and none of them cared to know more. The entire message was self serving and snide, acting like we were "friends" and she was just letting me know what was happening in her life as if I gave a crap.

I ignored her, even though I really wanted to blast her. However, I knew that it would only please her to see how she'd gotten under my skin. According to WH, she got off on knowing that she was having sex with another woman's husband, so I know she probably would have loved to get a reaction out of me. I have given her NONE. She doesn't deserve my time or attention. I have never felt inferior to her, I know I am a better woman and definetly a better mother, than her.

So, all that to say, IGNORE. If she doesn't get a rise out of you, then she doesn't get what she wants.

I know how shitty it is to deal with this. I'm sorry you're going through this. It all sucks!

posts: 444   路   registered: Oct. 10th, 2019
id 8837086
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BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 3:15 AM on Monday, May 20th, 2024

Holy delusional witches, Batman. That one is super crazy.

I鈥檓 tempted to say ship it all (including her note) to her husband, but a nice bonfire is probably smarter).
And unless she used the USPS, block however she reached out.

So sorry she has not crawled under the rock she belongs beneath.
Be extra nice to yourself.

Me: BS 57 (49 on d-day)Him: *who cares ;-) *. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)

**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **

posts: 6241   路   registered: Sep. 10th, 2016   路   location: Northern CA
id 8837088
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 KiboGaAru (original poster member #83847) posted at 6:14 AM on Monday, May 20th, 2024

Thanks everyone! Yes, I did not respond to her. I have to calm myself down. I smashed that gift of hers into pieces already.

As much as I want to talk to her H, the H himself doesn't want to communicate anymore. He blocked me and just wants to move on. The last time I talked to him, he said he was still vengeful about what happened and now this "gift".

Ugh! I just want this to end!! Groot1988, you are right. Since murder isnt an option at all (I wish though it is馃槄 --- kidding aside), the moment she sent the last message, I blocked her already!

Hellfire:
I couldnt agree more! it wasnt an apology at all. If you could just read what she said, you will know for sure that she wasn't sorry at all for what she did!

posts: 106   路   registered: Sep. 8th, 2023
id 8837096
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SacredSoul33 ( member #83038) posted at 3:26 PM on Monday, May 20th, 2024

Ten bucks says she's the one who blocked you on her husband's phone and social media platforms.

You need to block her, too. Don't allow this chaos agent to use you to get her jollies.

Gasping for air while volunteering to give others CPR is not heroic.

Your nervous system will always choose a familiar hell over an unfamiliar heaven.

posts: 1578   路   registered: Mar. 10th, 2023
id 8837138
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Chaos ( member #61031) posted at 5:06 PM on Monday, May 20th, 2024

Good for YOU for not taking her pathetic ass bait. She still very much wants you to know she can infiltrate your lives anyway she wants - even the "seemingly innocent" ways.

FUCK. THAT. SHIT.

Now - IMHO - because luck favors the prepared - avail yourself of an attorney (or three) free consultation and see what he/she advises your next step may be.

I don't think you've heard the last from this AP.

BS-me/WH-4.5yrLTA Married 2+ decades-2 adult children. Multiple DDays w/same LAP until I told OBS 2018- Cease & Desist sent spring 2021 "Hello鈥揗y name is Chaos鈥揧ou f***ed my husband-Prepare to Die!"

posts: 3939   路   registered: Oct. 13th, 2017   路   location: East coast
id 8837152
Topic is Sleeping.
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