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Newest Member: Plantlady

Wayward Side :
I cheated on my SO and I fully regret all my actions

Topic is Sleeping.
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 rebuildingmyself (original poster new member #79226) posted at 8:40 AM on Friday, August 6th, 2021

I really appreciate your message stubbornft. You're probably one of i mean the only one to feel this way. For some reason none of my parents, family members think like you, they think it's the fate put on me and i just have to live with it apparently, as i have been.

I know they're being unfair, despite all my efforts to make ends meet i'm still given no love. Well, it's a long story, i don't want to get off topic here, if you want to know, i can talk to you about it, so can we talk in direct message maybe?

But yea, I don't think I see myself ever leaving for some reason. i think because they're my parents? Probably

Hey Justsomeguy,

I am not going to lie, I have read your message quite a few times to really understand what you wrote.

I think I fairly understand your point. I said "might have been" because in our 5 month relationship, she has never brought these things up about me, which is why I was unaware. But I tried my best not to bring any of that in our relationship because I really love her, and I don't want to lose her. I have been egoistic in our fights, which is something I am trying to work on. I have been petty as well, but going forward, i don't want to fight with her. I think the fights happened because I didn't communicate properly, which is what i am going to be doing better.

I do take responsibility of being egoistic and I want to work on exploring myself. You mentioned an IC..um who's an IC?

Thank you for your message

posts: 6   ·   registered: Aug. 2nd, 2021
id 8681747
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stubbornft ( member #49614) posted at 4:57 PM on Friday, August 6th, 2021

rebuildingmyself therapy is your friend here. Of course your family tells you this - THEY don't want to deal with financially supporting your parents!!

It isn't your responsibility. It isn't fate. Your parents are choosing not to work.

We can't post links here but Google "parentification". What is happening is going to shape a lot of your life, it is going to cause issues in relationships. You are young and now is a good time to start working on this. My parents leaned on me and dumped their problems on me and caused me a lot of harm. You are not responsible for your parents. You were raised this way so you can't see it for what it is. But a therapist can help you. Please start ASAP. You deserve a good life!

You are welcome to message me, my son is 19, my job is to protect him and give him a good start. I am happy to support him financially while he is going to school, working and saving his money. I am so sorry you are in this situation but you can get out. Therapy can help so very much.

Me: BS 40 Him: WS 51 He cheated with massage parlor sex workersDday 01/19/2021
Kicked him out in 2021 - life is better on the other side. Moved on with the help of a wonderful therapist.

posts: 852   ·   registered: Sep. 14th, 2015   ·   location: TX
id 8681955
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Justsomeguy ( member #65583) posted at 6:39 PM on Saturday, August 7th, 2021

IC is an independent counselor, preferably one that specializes in infidelity.

I'm an oulier in my positions.

Me:57 STBXWW:55 DD#1: false confession of EA Dec. 2016. False R for a year.DD#2: confessed to year long PA Dec. 2 2017 (was about to be outed)Called it off and filed. Denied having an affair in court papers.

Divorced

posts: 1865   ·   registered: Jul. 25th, 2018   ·   location: Canada
id 8682116
Topic is Sleeping.
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