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The Book Club :
"A New Guide to Rational Living" by Ellis/Harper

Topic is Sleeping.
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 Ascendant (original poster member #38303) posted at 6:43 PM on Friday, September 5th, 2014

Has anyone else read this?

It's an oldie, with an original publish date of '61, but damn, is it blowing my mind.

It's like someone took all of my swirling thoughts regarding feelings, emotions, and interpersonal relationships...then clarified them, wrote them in a swingin' 60s', somewhat-sassy vibe and put pen to paper.

It's less a feel-good self-help book and more of a "stop feeling bad for yourself"-type self-help book. It *kind of* reminds me of "Things Fall Apart" a little bit (a VERY little bit, because the tone is so very different) in that it stresses the fact that we drive ourselves neurotic in our worry over other's behaviors and associated outcomes.

If you can get over the outdated idiomatic expressions, there's some really good stuff in here.

posts: 5193   ·   registered: Jan. 30th, 2013   ·   location: North of Chicago, Illinois
id 6935678
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20WrongsVs1 ( member #39000) posted at 1:33 AM on Saturday, September 6th, 2014

Ellis's work is cited frequently in the (21st century) book I'm reading now, "Feel the way you want to feel, no matter what!" by Pucci, and even though the writing style is a little conversational and sophomoric for my tastes, it explains...extensively...the rational emotive behavior therapy that Ellis & co pioneered. Good stuff.

fWW: 42
BH: 52
DDay: April 21, 2013
Sweet DS & fierce DD, under 10
Former motto: "Fake it till ya make it." Now: "You can't win if you don't play."

posts: 1523   ·   registered: Apr. 15th, 2013   ·   location: The First Coast
id 6936211
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solus sto ( member #30989) posted at 12:31 AM on Sunday, September 14th, 2014

This interests me--I like Ellis, but have not read this (just references to it). Thanks for reminding me to go to the source :)

[This message edited by solus sto at 6:32 PM, September 13th (Saturday)]

BS-me, 62; X-irrelevant; we’re D & NC. "So much for the past and present. The future is called 'perhaps,' which is the only possible thing to call the future. And the important thing is not to let that scare you." Tennessee Williams

posts: 15630   ·   registered: Jan. 26th, 2011   ·   location: midwest
id 6945189
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mamazen ( member #42137) posted at 1:42 AM on Thursday, October 30th, 2014

I read this book in the 70's or early 80's. I remember being very impressed with it. Forgot all about it. Thanks for reminding me it's still in print. I'll re-visit it. I also am reading "when things fall apart", so I'll be interested in the connection.

mamazen


me 57
WH 58
married 19 years
separated since 3/2013 (in house until 8/2013)
D FINAL! Sept 10 2014
D-day Dec 21 2013 (after separation)
2 sons 17 and 13
OW = family friend and WH work colleague, going on m

posts: 679   ·   registered: Jan. 20th, 2014   ·   location: canada
id 6993630
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LA44 ( member #38384) posted at 3:23 PM on Saturday, November 1st, 2014

Will take a look and this is why...

in that it stresses the fact that we drive ourselves neurotic in our worry over other's behaviors and associated outcomes.

Thanks for that.

Me: 44
He: 47 WH
Married: 15 years
D Day: December 2012
Affair: Fall 2009 - Dec. 2011
R is not linear

posts: 3442   ·   registered: Feb. 7th, 2013   ·   location: Canada, eh
id 6996730
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devasted30 ( member #39439) posted at 3:51 PM on Sunday, November 2nd, 2014

A really good book on this subject is, The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz. Easy read and makes sooooooooo much sense.

And remember Murphy is right. Nothing is so bad that it can't get worse!!!

posts: 1944   ·   registered: Jun. 4th, 2013   ·   location: Ontario, Canada
id 6997499
Topic is Sleeping.
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