Newest Member: Opacaro

Jdisco

Books on navigating separation

Anyone have any book recommendations on successfully navigating separation?

0 comment posted: Sunday, March 19th, 2023

Books on navigating separation (moved to Divorce/Separation)

  This Topic has been moved to Divorce/Separation

0 comment posted: Sunday, March 19th, 2023

Books on navigating separation

  Moving to Divorce/Separation

0 comment posted: Sunday, March 19th, 2023

What I need to know.

Hindsight 20/20 I wish I had separated with my WW on DDay. In response to a recent rage outburst I left and drove south to be with family and give everyone space. This has been the best thing! Working on meditation. Keeping up on the gym workouts and discussion with the WW has been so nice and calm and safe for both of us.

One thing I wanted to work through while I’m down here is what I need to know about the A. There are defiantly details my brain has bubbles up that if I never know won’t make a lick of difference. In my journal I tell myself I need to know the story up to the point when the "bedroom door" closes. (Hers was a ONS).

Things I am thinking I need to know include :

1. I want her to reaffirm this was and is the only A she has had.

2 I want to establish that even though things are tense and strained and we’re on the brink of Divorce that this is not acceptable behavior and I want her to promise me that she will handle it differently if she ever is faced with another opportunity she wants to take.

3 I want to know the story that led to the bedroom. How the fuck did this Rando guy sweep her off her feet. How did he make her feel so seen in a short period of time that she did this!!?

Thoughts? Ideally my list here are the comprehensive list of things I need to make an informed decision on if I can stay in this marring. Any suggestions on items I might not be thinking about ?

Thanks Fam.

10 comments posted: Sunday, March 12th, 2023

Feel Alone

DDay - 2/1/2023 but its been obvious for months now.


I just feel so alone and worthless everyday now. I have no one but her. Yes, I have family but none that I have told. I have one friend who knows who checks in on my every once in a while but no one understands where I am and its so fucking painful. Have some mutual friends who she told... who seem to be more like her party buddies now and helping her to avoid me or much else right now..My ONS WW shows little love for me but says she loves me, no understanding - says that I'm being cotrolling, no compassion - I just want her to hold me and tell me it will be ok. Fuck I've even thougth "I want my mommy" how pathetic is that?

Im in IC, WW is in IC, We've done 1 MC session.

anyway - Just introducing myself. Sense that I'll be spending some time here in the future.

16 comments posted: Monday, March 6th, 2023

working on R - Questions about WS

First Post - Hardly know where to begin.

DDay was Feb 1 2023. I fucking knew it! She's been putting distance between us since it happened in Sept 2022. When she finally admitted to the A, we both indicated our desire to R. However, she just doesn't seem like she is into it. I see posts that it can take time for a WS to recognize the damage done. I think right now seeing my anguish just makes her feel more guilty. She says it was part accidential , part exit. Yesterday she said her IC suggested a 6mo seperation because she things she is making me crazy.

I am certainly acting crazy. wild ups and downs. Tears daily, angry outburst (in front of the kids I am sorry to say).

If your reaction here is to post about how R is a myth - I'd prefer you save your energy

12 comments posted: Saturday, March 4th, 2023

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