Newest Member: chrisbb

Want2BHappyAgain

A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)

I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!

From respect comes great love...sassylee

This was unexpected

Grief sure has a weird way of bringing things up. My precious sister passed away recently crying ...and I have been dealing with a lot of feelings since the funeral. This year has been a rough year for me with the loss of more loved ones than in previous years. I can certainly understand this being a fact that comes about by being an older adult. My sister's death has been the hardest thus far though crying . I have lost other siblings...but she and I were very close and it...well...it HURTS crying .

One day recently I realized this was A season...and Dday...from my 1st M. I hadn't thought about this for a LONG time...but it sure came back in full force. I was recalling it to my H...and it surprised me how much detail I remembered...even though it had been 41 YEARS since this happened shocked !

I was a bit shocked at how I put myself right back in that moment. It was back when I was doing the "pick me dance"...and it was actually a very humiliating time for me. I didn't see it in the moment...but looking back through the years it was something that I cringed at the thought of. I also believe this was why my "lizard brain" kicked in to protect me when I experienced Dday with my 2nd H. At that Dday...I immediately told my 2nd H that our M was OVER...with NO emotion whatsoever. Lizard brain was a BADASS that day grin !

Of course...I have to analyze everything laugh ! I started wondering WHY did this thought pop into my head of that Dday so long ago? I haven't had anything to do with my XWH for MANY years...he truly is just someone I used to know. I also dismissed it being the upcoming holiday season because that hasn't been an issue for a LONG while either.

Then I thought about the grief I have been feeling. Even though it was terminal...and I KNOW my sister is not suffering anymore...it is still HARD to not have her here crying . The sadness has brought about other feelings of sadness that occurred in my life...and there was an awful lot of sadness 41 years ago.

I have often said that trauma doesn't get forgotten. MAN...did that ever come out as TRUTH! But...I can honestly say that the PAIN can go away...at least it did for me. Even though I recalled in vivid detail what happened on that particular night so long ago...it was as if I was reading from a newspaper about an incident that happened. I remembered that I had cried...I remembered that I was very hurt...but I didn't FEEL those things anymore...if that makes sense.

Oddly...during this time of grief...this recollection from 41 years ago has brought me comfort look . I FACED that part of my life...recalled every detail...and didn't cringe smile . I think I got healed from this...and it only took me 41 years. Better late than never grin !!

My H has been phenomenal though all of this...which reinforces that my decision to R was the RIGHT one in this M! My sister has HELPED me through this...even after her death...which I find comforting smile . God has as well...like He always does! He said He works for the GOOD of those who LOVE Him...and there was definitely some GOOD that came out of all of this! I will grieve...but I will be comforted. The PAIN does go away...but the LOVE remains smile .

12 comments posted: Tuesday, November 21st, 2023

Twelve Weeks Until Christmas!!!

You all know what is coming next tongue !!! I WANT MY CHRISTMAS PRESENT grin !!!!

For those who haven't seen this before...my Christmas present is to have the page TURN to the next page...this year it will be page 30 grin !!

What page you say??? WELL...let me tell you smile !! It is the "Positive Reconciliation Stories" thread that is pinned to the TOP of this Forum grin !!!

You've never read it before shocked ??? There is no better time than NOW grin !!

THIS thread is the first thread I look to when I get to the Reconciliation Forum smile . THIS thread is what kept me SANE when the world as I knew it got flipped-turned upside down. THIS thread gave me HOPE when it seemed like all hope was LOST.

This thread can HELP so many people who come on here who are new and in that RAW pain we all have felt when we first found this site smile . Just imagine...YOUR STORY could HELP another hurting soul...how cool is that???!!!

I have already harassed TWO people to post their wonderfully POSITIVE stories to that thread...and if they do...then only 5 more stories are needed to get that page to turn grin !!!

WHO will help to get me my Christmas present this year blink ???!!!

2 comments posted: Monday, October 2nd, 2023

I did it!!!

EVERY A season in the past I have written about it on here. I have written about moment-by-moment times that my H and his adultery co-conspirator spent together. I would write about the food they ate...the drinks they drank...the places they visited...and even how long they spent in his hotel room...or at her house...thanks to all the information I have. I felt that by writing about it on here...I would get desensitized to it...hoping that those days would soon just be MEH to me. In order to do this...well...I HAD to go over all of the expense reports...the time stamped receipts...the emails...the google timeline...stuff like that in order to MAKE SURE I had everything correct. EVERY YEAR.

My lil bro on here...Unhinged...was supportive with what I was doing...at first! Last year though...he gave me a challenge...to STOP writing about it on here so that I wouldn't HAVE to be going over all of that evidence. It rattled me. Having all of this information was comforting to me in a way. I could SEE what was happening at that time. It was like I could feel some type of CONTROL during that point. Then...on July 18th of each year...I could put it away...and not have to go back over it. At least...not until the NEXT A season. Like all of you wonderful people on here...Unhinged wanted to HELP...and I took his challenge under consideration.

So...THIS YEAR...I didn't look...at ANYTHING from the evidence I had from my H's A. I didn't do a play-by-play on here either! The ONLY thing that was something from around my H's A was the "memories" feed on Facebook that would pop up. It didn't show up every day...and it was a memory of what I was doing around that time...so it had nothing to do with my H's A.

I had a little anxiety going into A season...but as the weeks went by...it got better and better! I had a total of 4 meltdowns...which is a HUGE difference from the multiple meltdowns DAILY for the first few years. AND...there were a few times that I actually FORGOT stuff!! I even caught myself on certain days realizing that I hadn't remembered the significance of THAT particular day during my H's A! I was AMAZED at how LITTLE significance it played this time!!

Granted...there are some events happening in my life at this point...particularly deaths of beloved family members...that make what happened NINE YEARS AGO very insignificant to me NOW. It was interesting that the meltdowns I had correlated to the passing of my family members. I am sure it has something to do with it...but it is something I will address later. I need to process the grief right now.

But...one GOOD thing from all of this is that A season is OVER!! I handled it MUCH better than I thought I would...and I am very PROUD that I didn't even try to look at any of the evidence...AT ALL!! For ME...THIS WORKS!! I am so looking forward to NEXT A season...which is something I NEVER thought I would say!! Onward and UPward!!! Thank You God!!!

Unhinged...lil bro...THANK YOU!!! I never thought I could do it...but with YOUR encouragement...I DID!!

16 comments posted: Tuesday, July 18th, 2023

Rising above the manipulation, gaslighting, and lying from the A

I am past the middle part of A season...and I have to admit that it is going much better than I thought! I have had a few blow outs...3...but for the most part I am not dwelling on it. Because I have so much information from the A my H had while working overseas...I could tell just how much time they spent together...which wasn't much. It doesn't matter though...the first time he messaged the adultery co-conspirator my H nuked our M. It has been kind of a curse in the past knowing all of what I know because I also have the added memory of what I was feeling during this time. The manipulation...gaslighting...lying that my H did to me during this time has brought out ANGER like nothing else I have ever had to deal with.

I learned a long time ago that anger is a secondary emotion...brought on by a primary emotion such as guilt...hurt...etc. For ME...the DISRESPECT my H showed me brought about this visceral ANGER every time I thought about it. It was hard to look for the primary emotion when the anger would hit...but through all of these years I have been able to focus on looking for it in order to work on that emotion...which would cause the anger to subside. Moving past the memories of what I THOUGHT had happened to the REALITY of what actually happened has helped me to see my H's A in a different perspective.

What my H was doing to my mental health during his A was so destructive. I was made to feel like I was crazy for questioning my H about certain items on his expense reports...or other feelings my GUT was screaming at me for. But I took it back...or as I like to say...I OWNED IT!! It took work...and I couldn't rush the process. Lord knows I tried!! Little by little though I became stronger. In the end I realized what the vets on here had been trying to get me to understand...my H's A had NOTHING to do with ME. MY feelings...MY truths...MY actions during this time...they were all SINCERE. I was collateral damage...but my CORE was still very much intact.

Looking at his A without all of that emotional baggage...I can clearly see that the MOST disrespect was what my H and his adultery co-conspirator showed each other. The manipulation...gaslighting...and lying was needed in order for each of them to continue having their A. I would think that this is true for ALL A's. After Dday...once each of them knew that they were being USED by the other...as IS the case in ALL A's...any residual feelings they may have had for each other dissipated quickly. I can definitely understand this! When people have used me in the past...including my H...my feelings have completely changed.

The manipulation...gaslighting...and lying was actually the worst thing each of them did to themselves. When my H got out of the A fog and had to face the reality of what the A actually was...the DISGUST he felt was overwhelming. The adultery co-conspirator had written an email to my H after he sent her the NC message on Dday. In it she told him how dumping her like he did made her feel like a USED...USELESS...NOBODY. The thing is though...she agreed to the "rule" that after my H left her country...they would no longer have ANY contact. All of these "rules" were agreed to before they ever had sex...so the adultery co-conspirator KNEW them. She may have felt though that rules were made to be broken because morals tend to be lacking with cheaters.

What I used to see as a curse...I now see as a BLESSING! I do need to address the tinge of glee that I have felt periodically from seeing them each self destruct...but I will deal with that later...LOL! My main feeling toward them is empathy. I definitely wouldn't want to be in either of their shoes...but I can still feel compassion for them falling so far off of the right path to end up where they did.

I still pray for the adultery co-conspirator...and I truly hope that she has found some kind of healing to stop this destructive pattern. She told my H that her first A was with her Aunt's boyfriend...because she had admired him so much when she was growing up. To ME...it seems like he was a predator who was grooming her at a young age to have sex with him. The adultery co-conspirator may have had a skewed vision of what LOVE really is from this man's possible grooming. Who knows. She ended up losing her husband when he found out she had an A with her boss. One would think that this would change her perspective on A's...but apparently it clearly didn't. The adultery co-conspirator CAN still be redeemed...like my H has. I sincerely HOPE that she has sought to go on the right path.

As for ME...I'm doing pretty good! The trauma from the A will always be there...just like every other trauma I have been through. EVERYONE experiences some type of trauma in their lifetime. It took me over 10 years of grieving after my Mama passed away before I could start to see a path forward from the trauma of losing her. Death is so FINAL. I used to think that cheating was FINAL also. That was the experience I had when my 1st H cheated on me. But...my friends...it doesn't have to be. There can be a BEAUTIFUL M that can come out of all of this UGLINESS. My H and I are living proof of that!!

12 comments posted: Wednesday, June 28th, 2023

Wide Awake

I woke up from a sound sleep a few hours ago. I haven't done this in a while. After about a half hour of trying to go back to sleep...I reached for my phone and saw the date...May 1. Now I get it.

May is when my H's A started...9 years ago. He didn't meet the adultery co-conspirator until May 11...and they didn't get to fuck until June...but it wasn't from a lack of trying. Many "firsts" happened for them in May...first date...first kiss...etc.

When all of this came to light...the following year...January of 2015...was excruciating for me. It meant that I was going to have to go through the months of May-July. After a few years that despair went away. But the feeling of dread when May 1st rolled around still remained for another few years.

I used to do a journal of sorts on here...EVERY YEAR...starting on May 1st until my Dday...July 19th. My lil bro...Unhinged...challenged me last year to NOT do one this year!! I accepted that challenge...and y'all will be happy to know that you don't have to see any thread like that from me THIS year. Sort of...LOL!!

I came on here to write about why this happened. I KNOW what it is...I write about it often. My limbic system has kept track of the experience I have had with this particular day. Lizard brain went into hyper drive and woke me up!! I KNOW how to combat it. I can have a GOOD experience today...and that will calm my lizard brain in the future. It's harder than it seems though...as most of us already KNOW.

When I got on here...the FIRST thread I saw when looking at the different Forums on the main page is the "Positive Reconciliation Stories" thread that is pinned at the top of this Forum!! I am the unofficial cheerleader for that thread...as most of you already KNOW as well!! That was an extremely GOOD experience!! Then I read the posts from SoveriegnCrux and Notaboringwife...and I SMILED.

I believe that everything happens for a reason. I KNOW that it was meant for me to wake up when I did...get on here when I did...and read what I did. Thank You God!!! Surprisingly...not surprisingly...I am now sleepy again...LOL!! But my alarm will go off in 10 minutes for me to start my day...so maybe I will plan for a little afternoon nap later. Or not. I just KNOW that I am in control of MY thoughts...and TODAY...will be a POSITIVE one for me!!

13 comments posted: Monday, May 1st, 2023

Will I get my Christmas present again this year????????

I can't remember when I started this...but it has been at least 3 or 4 years when I ask for y'all to give me a Christmas present...turning the page on the "Positive Reconciliation Stories" thread smile . EVERY year you WONDERFUL friends and family have made sure I have gotten my Christmas present grin !!! May I have it again...PLEASE blink ???!!!

I do this for several reasons...but the one that sticks out the most to me is the memory from when I first joined this site. I was looking all over the internet for POSITIVE stories from people who had survived infidelity...and went on to THRIVE despite it. When I found THIS site...there was actually a PLACE designated for just that grin !!! At the time...there were only 8 pages to go through...but I read EVERY POST. It gave me HOPE when I had very little. It made me SMILE when I was so tired of crying. It let me see that if others could go through infidelity HELL and still come out intact...then maybe I could too!!!

Most of the stories I read in the "Positive Reconciliation Stories" thread that is pinned at the top of this Forum were from BW's. Now though...there are several posts from people who are on all sides of the A triangle...giving a very diverse perspective of what a POSITIVE reconciliation looks like grin . A good plug for this site...if you UPGRADE...you can read all the EDITED posts in that thread too blink !!

Finally...and probably most importantly...POSITIVE mindsets bring out the feel good hormones and give us a great sense of well being smile . THIS particular thread is about reconciliation. So even if you are just starting out...like I was back on page 9...or are years out...like I am on page 28...being in R will have some very POSITIVE things going on. I want to read ALL about it grin !!!

Another PLUS about having an UPGRADE is that you can see who has been on here in the last 5 minutes. I SEE you people who have been on this site for YEARS popping in and out...but you don't post tongue . NOW would be a great time to post your Positive Reconciliation Story grin !!! We would TRULY LOVE to read it grin !!!

So...even though this is all about ME laugh ...it is really all about US who are in a positive reconciliation smile . There are other Forums dedicated to POSITIVE new beginnings...and POSITIVE divorces and separations. I have very POSITIVE things to say about when I went for D with my 1st H and when I had my new beginning with my 2nd H smile ! But THIS thread is the one in this Forum dedicated to POSITIVE reconciliation stories smile . I've already written TWO on page 28...along with my H who wrote one as an anniversary present to me grin . There are only 5...maybe 6 stories needed in order to TURN THE PAGE. Would YOU be the one to give me my Christmas present this year??????? PLEASE blink ???!!!

10 comments posted: Wednesday, November 30th, 2022

Unusual triggers around this time of year

The devil really is trying to screw with my head right now!! I normally don't have triggers around the holidays anymore...but these last few days have brought up memories from 8 years ago that have me...well...triggered look .

The World Cup is playing now. They were playing 8 years ago...during the time my H was having his A. The United States had gotten out of contention...but the Netherlands was still going strong...so my H and I were rooting for that team since he was over there. After Dday I found that he and the adultery co-conspirator were talking about it too...just like others in that country.

Then there was recently the conviction of 3 people for murder in the downing of MH17 back in 2014...on the same day that my H flew out of the Netherlands. I froze when I saw the date come on the TV screen. It was something that I wasn't expecting to see...and it took me back to that day...when I was so worried about my H's flight.

I know that these triggers aren't anything happening NOW...but lizard brain doesn't care about WHEN...it just cares about the experience duh . I'm doing well...especially since we all have electricity and other things that we didn't have last year after Ida. I have been really excited to get back to having a NORMAL holiday season after these last 2 years of NOT normal!!! It is just seeing these things happening...when they usually aren't in this time frame...it makes me feel like something evil is trying to steal my peace.

I pray for all of us having to go through times like these. The "firsts" are always hard (((HUGS))). Then there are those who have had Ddays around the holidays...which only adds another layer to this heaping pile we have all been dumped in. Life does go on...and it CAN be a happy time again smile . I have the tools to combat this...and I am far enough removed to be able to have peace as well. But even this far out...some things just come up to remind me of a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day when the world as I knew it...ended sad .

10 comments posted: Thursday, November 24th, 2022

The shit sandwich

My H and I just got back from an AWESOME vacation...and I can honestly say that it was FUN...but there is NO place like HOME smile !!

I looked in every now and then on this wonderful site...and those words..."shit sandwich" kept popping up on different posts on here. I never did like that phrase...or even the thought of having to EAT that...just YUCK barf !! I apologize for not remembering the exact threads that these words showed up in...but I noticed a distinction in how those words were used. It seemed to me that the people writing about having to EAT the shit sandwich were people who were NOT in R. They either stayed in the M for other reasons...or they were D.

I also seem to remember people who were in R who stated that they didn't eat ANY shit sandwich. That is how I feel. I truly feel that I got shit ON when my H confessed to his A...but there was NO WAY I was going to EAT any of it!! It was my H who piled that stinky...sticky...putrid NASTY on our M. If anyone was going to HAVE to eat it...it would be HIM!! However...like someone's tagline says on here...shit can be cleaned up grin . NO ONE HAS TO EAT IT. That is MY perspective anyway smile .

I often write about how things are all about perspective. So I am wondering...for those who feel they have had to EAT a shit sandwich...what is YOUR perspective on that? WHY do you feel you HAD to eat it in order to R? Are you in R?

For those who feel like I do...what is YOUR perspective? WHY do you feel there was NO shit sandwich you ate when you decided to R? Are you in R?

31 comments posted: Thursday, August 11th, 2022

Happy Anniversary of Mv2.0!!

TODAY...8 years ago...the precious M that I LOVED was destroyed when my H confessed to his A that he had while working overseas crying . It is gone...and although we have been able to get many things back...it is something we won't ever have again.

But wait...there's MORE grin !! We COULD dwell on what was LOST. But we have CHOSEN to instead focus on what we HAVE!!

I wrote about this day in the "Positive Reconciliation Stories" thread. It is on page 13 if anyone is interested smile .

OUR life changed forever that day...for the BETTER!! I honestly thought we had a GOOD M. But that was the issue. WE weren't thinking the same...and my H made a choice that showed just how out of sync we were.

Not anymore!! We have truly become ONE. A TEAM!! I can honestly say that I HATE what my H did...and also honestly say that I am MORE in love with him than ever before grin . His ACTIONS have proven to me that he is a man of integrity...but WORDS matter too. His words that he uses NOW truly reflect his actions. That was something I never caught before. You don't know what you don't know though...you know?!

We WILL be celebrating tonight because OUR story didn't END on Dday. It CHANGED...it got MESSY...and it was UNCERTAIN for a while. But WE both went ALL IN for each other...and I LOVE the story of US now grin !!!

11 comments posted: Wednesday, July 20th, 2022

Here it is again

May 1st...the beginning of the month where BOTH of my H's started their A's...almost 30 years to the DAY look . Every year you wonderful people allow me to indulge in my journey of MY A season antiversary. Thank y'all for that smile .

A little back story for those who don't know. Because my H had his PA while working alone overseas...I have finite times to when THEY first met...down to THEIR last kiss. I could practically tell how long THEY were together...ate dinner...fucked...thanks to the google timeline that I was told about from this amazing site. The phone records...emails...whatsapp messages and SKYPE provided a plethora of information too. I have calendars that I made in Excel for May-July that are FULL of all of that...plus the minutes...sometimes seconds...from the time-stamped receipts of the events that THEY went to.

SO...EVERY freaking year I would pull out those danged calendars...pore over them...and get very BUMMED OUT remembering how I FELT during this time while he was away crying . I didn't get all of the info at first. In fact...the Craigslist account that I found out about on here...was somewhere after year 1. The google timeline I found out somewhere between year 2 and 3 I think. With the new information gathering from these two...I had to look at the calendars and make sure everything FIT. Doing all of this just created a RUT in my brain of EVERY FREAKING THING THEY DID during A season. It was pure torture. Especially June crying . THEY met after May started...and my H left the adultery co-conspirator's country in the middle of July...so there are parts of those two months where THEY didn't know or have contact with each other. But in June...my H called the adultery co-conspirator EVERY DAMN DAY crying .

This is my 8th A season that is coming up. I have tried different things to help me HEAL from this time. The BEST thing I ever did was to have my H PLAN a fabulous vacation on the FIRST A season that correlated with some of THEIR firsts...first date...first kiss...etc. It was so HARD to go through this vacation in a city that WE had never been to...so it was OUR first time there. EVERYTHING we did there was a FIRST for US...and it was NOT a fun time for me...at first. But as I went through these days...and STARED THEM DOWN...I became STRONGER smile . I now have AWESOME triggers to combat the horrible triggers from around that time. I OWN their FIRSTS!!! Did you see what I did there??? Extra points to those who figure it out laugh !!!

Around year 4 I purposefully made myself STOP looking at the calendars. I had ALL the information I could possibly have...I conquered everything I could...and there was NO reason to keep looking BACK. I honestly couldn't forget what had happened though because I had relived it from the previous years. But by year 6...I really had begun to forget...WIN-WIN for ME grin . Last year I decided to look at the calendars and the google timeline again. I was far enough removed from the emotion to look at it more clinically. I actually saw things that I had never realized before when the emotions were so high. These were things that helped me to understand WHY certain things happened during the A. Things that showed how MANIPULATIVE they each were toward one another laugh . We ALL know that every A is FAKE. Like someone once pointed out though...the sex is real. True. But the manipulation...the USING of each other that goes on with an A...that is real as well wink .

THIS year I am doing something that I started doing last year toward the end. I am going to look at the google timeline...for ALL of the years AFTER 2014 smile . I've got SEVEN times...SEVEN memories...EVERY DAY to look through the 68 days of their A...that WE have had since then grin . I actually started yesterday...with my H eagerly looking with me!! The first one brought a sad memory...it was a funeral we went to for a dear friend of ours sad . But it was FUN to see the other 6 and try to figure out exactly what was happening on that day smile . The year 2020...we didn't go anywhere on May 1st...and I am sure that will be the case for most of those days for that year laugh !!! Thank God THAT is behind us too!!

I will come back to this thread from time to time as A season progresses...just like I have with other threads I have started during this period. It is sort of a way for me to chronicle MY journey...MY feelings...and MY TRIUMPHS over A season grin . But I feel the need to write about it less and less. There is too much LIFE to LIVE on THIS side of infidelity!! Thank You God grin .

22 comments posted: Monday, May 2nd, 2022

I got a new vehicle

After Dday...I started working on a PLAN for what I wanted MY life to be. I WANTED a healthy and happy M with a loving and faithful spouse smile . I told my H about it...and told him if HE didn't want this too...I would find somebody who DID!! Thankfully...my H told me this was what he wanted as well...and we started working toward this plan smile .

I still had the thought in the back of my mind at that point...WHAT IF? What if my H wasn't sincere? What if this happened again? With me being a SAHW...I was NOT financially at a point where I could quickly LEAVE if any of the "what ifs" came to be true. So I put another PLAN in action...one to where I could leave at ANY moment. I got a checking account in my name only...with enough money to sustain me in a new apartment until I found a job and started earning a living. I also got a credit card in my name only. Finally...I got a new vehicle...in my name only.

That was almost 8 years ago. I still have the checking account...and the credit card...but my vehicle was getting a little rough around the edges laugh . I really didn't use it much...and it was more of a symbolic part of my independence. But there were repairs that needed to be done that were signs that maybe it was time to look for something else. With inflation the way it is now...I was NOT happy about the prices I was seeing when I was looking online for vehicles. There was this ONE car though that looked cool...and the price was right blink .

Of course...other things in our life started taking precedent...and we found ourselves traveling again. We also had our anniversary coming up grin . When we got back home...and went to one of our favorite restaurants to celebrate almost 40 YEARS together...my H asked if I wanted to go and see the car I had looked at online. I just KNEW it was gone by this time...late model used cars nowadays don't last very long on the lots. But...I figured...why not? So I called...and surprisingly...it was still for sale! Y'all know that when God wants us to have something...He finds a way for us to get it grin !! Everything just fell into place...like it was meant to be.

When we were negotiating the sale...my H told the salesman we wanted it in MY name smile . He didn't have to do that...I am very secure that WE will be together for the long haul. But I really thought that was a sweet gesture my H made to insure that I felt SAFE!

ANOTHER GOOD thing that happened...I OWNED another trigger grin !! That part I have in italics in a previous paragraph...Everything just fell into place...like it was meant to be. Those words were what WE used to say when God had a hand in our lives. Those were also the words my H used when he described his A crying . To ME...and HIM...he felt like God was condoning the A duh . That was...until my H started recounting what had actually taken place up to the time he fucked the adultery co-conspirator. Things definitely DID NOT just fall into place...and there was NO WAY God was having it being something that was "meant to be" rolleyes . BUT THIS CAR PURCHASE WAS grin . It was NO coincidence that things happened the way they did...at the time they did...and EVERY detail...even the salesman we had...was very much a part of God's PLAN!! So YES dear friends and family on here...this was so much MORE than just a car purchase smile . This was EPIC!!!

THEN we came home and my H gifted me with the anniversary present I asked for...a story to put in the "Positive Reconciliation Stories" thread that is pinned at the top of this Forum blink . Did y'all even notice???!!! I have been advocating for people to write THEIR positive posts into that thread...but I am kind of liking seeing my H's username up there...so y'all don't need to be too quick to write something in there...for now laugh !!!

We each read the other one's post...and were smiling at the similarities laugh . We each wrote our story separately...and we LOVED how we had God be a huge part in our individual stories grin !! It is logical though. God played such an IMPORTANT part in OUR R...and we both felt it was equally as important to include Him in our story! He truly IS the BEST IC and MC anyone could ask for!!! I NEVER thought about US being the WS/BS couple to write in that thread before either! I really HOPE we won't be the LAST couple to do it either blink !! Having something GOOD coming out of something that was so BAD is truly worth writing about grin !! WE are LOVING our Mv2.0!!!

Now it is time for me to go and pick up my NEW (to me!) car grin !!! If y'all are in Cajun Country...and see an old woman zooming around town in a cute car...grinning from ear to ear...well...DAT BE ME grin !!!

9 comments posted: Monday, April 25th, 2022

Respectful dialogue about Covid

There have been LOTS of topics written about Covid on here. We could go on and on about all of this. What we NEED is to have a respectful dialogue to HELP each other.

I'll start smile . I take Zinc and extra doses of Vitamin D. I have found by doing this that the sinus issues I normally have during this time of year because of it being sugar cane harvesting time...has not happened. Big PLUS for me grin !

Also...because sunlight kills Covid...I take a shopping cart from outside that has been in the sunlight...before going into the store. I used to wipe it down as well...but then the wipes started to run out. I still take them from outside though.

I also have wet wipes that my H has poured alcohol into...since alcohol kills Covid. I use those wipes a LOT!! I have been teased for YEARS about my obsessive handwashing...so washing my hands regularly is not a big deal. I am also LOVING the extra hand sanitizing stations everywhere now smile . We are told that this is an airborne virus...but masks obviously don't work for it. For ME...keeping my hands clean and away from my nose and mouth have worked well with other viruses in the past...and seem to be working well now.

I feel it is not a matter of IF I will get the virus...it is a matter of WHEN. However...I am in my 60's and have never had the flu. I very rarely had the cold either...and have not had one since my children are grown. So either my immune system is doing very well...or my mitigation efforts are working. I feel it is probably a combination of both. I am also a SAHW...so I am not in a work environment with a lot of people. Even when I did work though...I was pretty healthy. Also...I get out and go into the grocery store...pharmacy...department stores...etc. It is much easier to avoid contact though when I am not in an enclosed environment with several people for hours. This was how most of the people I know who have had Covid contracted it.

Is there anyone else who would like to have a respectful dialogue about this?

473 comments posted: Friday, January 7th, 2022

Thankful Thursday

Hi there all you SI Reconcilers !! It is a GORGEOUS day in NOLA...and I am feeling pretty good today. Especially since I saw another AWESOME post in the "Positive Reconciliation Stories" thread which is pinned at the TOP of this Forum !! THANK YOU sunwillshine!!!

Maybe we can have a breather from thoughts of infidelity for a bit and come up with some things that bring us happiness in our reconciliation . I'll start!!!

The other night I told my H that he was my whole world. He responded by saying that I was his whole universe PLUS one planet . I asked WHICH planet...thinking that he was going to say VENUS...the planet of LUUUUUVE.

His response...with that cute grin of his...URANUS !!! We had a big laugh about that...laughter truly IS the best medicine isn't it ?!

So...maybe that book is wrong...men aren't from MARS...they have a whole different mindset !!!

Anyone else have a cute...funny...thankful...HAPPY story to tell??? I am looking forward to reading all about it !!

692 comments posted: Sunday, October 18th, 2020

NtV...does this count???

My H was preparing jalapenos...stuffing them with cream cheese and wrapping them in bacon . He made the comment that he, "can cut the cheese with a butter knife" .

Will THIS be enough for the favor you said you would do for me ???!!!

What do the rest of you dear SIers say...is THIS an appropriate fart joke???!!! Help me out people...I am NOT very good at this kind of stuff...but I need y'all to help me convince NTV that this is good enough .

33 comments posted: Saturday, December 23rd, 2017

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