Dday -9/23/2012 Reconciled

10 year antiversary

Hi there! It’s been a while since I posted here, but SI was a life (and marriage) saver for me back in the day. I remember being SO desperate for the "why", for some meaning, some relief from the pain. The wise people here helped me so very much.

We have made it 10 years! It’s been a long road but we are in a much better place and I have a marriage that satisfies me, I feel adored and like I have a true partner. None of that was true even long before his A. The issues that he was finally forced to deal with are not resolved, per se, but are out in the open, and the years of therapy, books, talks, etc have helped us grow individually and as a couple.

For those of you early in the process I have to say that, for me, it was a few years before thoughts of the A were not my constant companion. Five years before an entire day went by without those thoughts. Now, most days it doesn’t enter my mind and it’s been a while since the thoughts caused me pain. Even early on there were happy times (HB helped!) but also times I would be sitting at a traffic light and would burst into tears.

Even though I can now see that I made a poor choice of a husband (all the red flags were there, but hey, I was 21!) I am glad that I chose to reconcile and can see myself growing old/er with this man as my partner.

I wish you all the best on your own journeys.

6 comments posted: Saturday, September 24th, 2022