Cookies are required for login or registration. Please read and agree to our cookie policy to continue.

Newest Member: nbc2024

General :
Is it normal?

Topic is Sleeping.
default

 Ttwrcg (original poster new member #77124) posted at 11:00 PM on Friday, August 2nd, 2024

I have been in reconciliation for almost 4 years. I was triggered yesterday and can’t stop crying and revisiting the old hurts. Is this normal? I haven’t felt this way in 6 months and I thought I was done with these episodes.

posts: 2   ·   registered: Jan. 11th, 2021
id 8844056
default

Chaos ( member #61031) posted at 11:28 PM on Friday, August 2nd, 2024

HELL YES!
Just because you are reconciled and may be healed - doesn't mean you aren't human. And when it has been a while and those triggers come from left field - they hit a new kind of hard.

Feel the feels. Cry the tears. Take your time with it. Be gentle with yourself.

And...don't forget to then stand the F up and keep on going about being the bad ass that is Ttwrcg

BS-me/WH-4.5yrLTA Married 2+ decades - 2 adult children. Multiple DDays w/same AP until I told OBS 2018 Cease & Desist sent spring 2021 "Hello–My name is Chaos–You f***ed my husband-Prepare to Die!"

posts: 3857   ·   registered: Oct. 13th, 2017   ·   location: East coast
id 8844059
default

hikingout ( member #59504) posted at 11:30 PM on Friday, August 2nd, 2024

Yes. Normal. Grief is not linear and I think of it as a healing release. My husband is 7 years out and he can still be triggered on something. If you sit with it, allow yourself to feel it, it will pass. It is scary because you don’t want to go back to where you were, that is unlikely what this is. You will release it and over time as you have triggers they will be less intense and hang out for less time. Totally normal. Honor what your mind and body is working to purge.

7 years of hard work - WS and BS - Reconciled

posts: 7481   ·   registered: Jul. 5th, 2017   ·   location: Arizona
id 8844060
default

jb3199 ( member #27673) posted at 11:38 PM on Friday, August 2nd, 2024

While I agree that this can be normal, I will ask---Do you believe that you were thorough in the processes leading up to the start of your reconciliation? By that, I mean did ask all the questions that you wanted, and got as close to the truth as you believe you can? You didn't try to sweep big issues under the rug, hoping that they would go away?

We don't have much of a backstory. Often times, this trauma will resurface because it has been unresolved. Not saying that is the case, but something you should ask yourself.

BH-50s
WW-50s
2 boys
Married over 30yrs.

All work and no play has just cost me my wife--Gary PuckettD-Day(s): EnoughAccepting that I can/may end this marriage 7/2/14

posts: 4362   ·   registered: Feb. 21st, 2010   ·   location: northeast
id 8844063
Topic is Sleeping.
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.001.20241001a 2002-2024 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy